Beware of labor pain even before conceiving ….

(Disclaimer: ***Pun intended *** should I be telling this? :P all my posts are anyways pun intended :P !!!)

I know you must be thinking that Ramya has gone complete nuts! But friends what if I say end of the post you will completely agree with me as at some point or the other every one of you (if you are an Indian, married and Male or Female) then trust me would have undergone this labor pain!!! Surprised?

Here u go, this post is all about how a married couple is easily attacked in front of everyone by questions like “So when is the good news coming?” “So when are you promoting us?” “I got a dream of u telling me about good news, so anything up that you want to share it with us?”

Surprisingly all these different words and different questions only mean “When are you producing offspring?”  or to be more bad “You are anyways gaming legally now, when do you plan to produce some output of the game”  

Now I see every one of you in agreement with me J? … Last few days such questions are raining on me and so it is more interesting to share with you all and get your insight on it … (actually the real intent is when you comment on this, I get a sadistic satisfaction that there are many like me who have suffered or suffering due to such questions)

Well, you will surely find my frustration or rant justified when you know the questions that are showered on me over last few years, and surprisingly these questions also varies with time.

1.             First year into marriage and on first anniversary: “So anything new ?”, “so when is little one coming”, “you have put on so anything good”( :P well this questions is double stab!) , First anniversary you get less congratulations but be sure to get more comment and questions on when is the little one coming!!!!
2.             Second year into marriage: Doubt is building up furiously … “So u guys seem like planning and postponing baby”, “I think Its already 2 years you are married nooooo,” no question doesn’t end here It continues and ends with random aunt hissing in my ear as “Did u visit doctor?” at this point I feel like peeling my ear out and giving it to her !!!    
3.       Third year and from then on: You will start hating to attend any social gathering cause everybody there makes u feel like one sloth bear lagging behind in race whereas every other aunt and uncle has news to tell about their son or daughter who has conceived and delivered within a year (worth a noble price :P) and almost everybody will have lot more random questions, some have gone to the extent like “are you both not interested?”, “I think you should pray to this Swamiji, My daughter conceived in just a month!!!” (I wonder what swamiji does :P), Final one to conclude my rant is about the solution offered by some great aunt   “You should consult a Sex Therapist!”

PERIOD!!!! Just cant say anything more, doesn't this hurt more than Labor pain :P???

But then this is just my silent rant, even after all these Questions, Solutions and suggestions my reply would be a smile and a nod!!!  

Tell me why???

Roads are laid very neatly and beautifully, there are no dirt littered around on the roads, Streets are just not well lit but are overly lit by colorful lights as well, no power cuts, all the sewage system properly maintained, Water supply 24hrs and Public transport running all around the city right on time, all these and more not in any other developed country or its not my imagination of Rama Rajya, but it’s hard to believe when I say it’s in namma Bengaluru in my very own country India…I see many eyes wide opened in disbelief !!!

Yes, it was exactly this scenario when there was just a week for Elections here! By which I mean just before a week and all those 5 years the roads were full of pot holes, dirt littered, with no street light, power fluctuations, problems for basic facility etc and etc.  But just as the election approaches, the ruling party or member of that particular ward is all awake and starts all these activities and more. And for this they claim that he or she has been doing all these and more over last few years and so they should be elected again. Whereas all those years, we dumb citizen see them alone progressing but nothing else.

Now you all learned people tell me why should I vote?

1.  To see progress of elected people from car to caaaaars, home to Bungalow, belly to Pot Belly, and gold accessories to Gold mines!
2.  No matter who comes in power, I still have to bribe for my rights!
3.  I am still scared to walk in the night alone, forget night even in day light one has to think twice to step out.
4.  I mostly end up with slip disc or crack my spine because of those humps and poor quality roads which chip into potholes
5.  I still have to walk in streets that smell of those unclean and poorly maintained Waste bins, oops sorry some places don’t even have those, both streets and dustbins!!!
6.  I still see people not having basic facilities, bribed for voting, literacy rate with no improvement and where as the crime rate increasing exponentially.

For these reason if I forcefully try to forget that I should be voting, I am reminded by every other Movie Star, KMF by printing on milk covers and lot many NGOs, to vote and in some cases many or threatened to vote. There is no one to answer these questions but every other celebrity posses in their best with a statement saying “Voting is your right” “Be an Indian cast your vote”!!!! So when the sewage is blocked in my locality do I ask these Stars to clean it up?

Such frustrations were spurting like hot lava in me, as I stood in the hot sun waiting for my turn to prove that I am an Indian. But I am still waiting for an answer; tell me why should I vote? Tell me why?

Prayers unanswered...

For sure all of us will have a list of prayers unanswered isn’t it? Here is my list which is pending from last 20yrs!

1. I always had a very short hair most of the times I was mistaken to be a boy kid and so my every night prayer was requesting god to give me long hair over night which I can braid beautifully in the next morning.  Oh yes it did grow an inch after several weeks and then it was given in the hands of the barber down the street who my dad considered the best hair stylist in the whole world to cut it mercilessly , … Phew all those crying
2. Prayed so many nights that the next morning there should be school holiday and the notice should be like ‘School is closed for 1year’.  A variation of this prayer was expecting summer holidays in the month of December.
3. When I was 4, I was too curious to taste coffee obviously I was too bored of those health drinks like Horlicks and Complan. When asked for coffee, I had got a very convincing explanation from Amma saying only elderly people who sport mustache drink coffee, so almost every day I prayed for Mustache!!!
4. I always prayed god to turn my younger sister into a little kitten, because I always wanted cat as my sibling and Amma by mistake delivered my sister!!! And every morning I peeped into the cradle to see if my prayer was answered until one day I was caught by Appa and got nice beatings for waking up my sister.
5. My very serious prayer was requesting god to send my look alike to my home, remember those 80s movie where hero’s look alike suddenly comes home!!! And so I wished for one such entry in my life too, so that I could use her as my body double when Appa showered his beatings on me!
6. I prayed god that I should be kidnapped on June 1^st as that’s the only way I can miss the school and not be blamed as well, I prayed this for almost 4 years not once it was answered !!!

These are very few which I can remember now and I am sure you all will also have such unanswered prayers. Please… please share it with me :D so that I feel better that I am not the only one who is been neglected by dear god for so many years ….